


Destiny Strikes By Accident

by padfootagain



Category: British Actor RPF
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-19 12:26:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17001642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/padfootagain/pseuds/padfootagain
Summary: When you fall from your motorbike, trying to avoid a car, you are certain that you are dead. But then, you realize that the accident might not have been lethal… One thing is for sure, the man you meet through this disaster will turn your world upside-down.





	1. Car Accident

**Author's Note:**

> Series complete. Hope you like it! Fluff and a bit of angst :)

You were late. Of course, it was Monday morning and you had celebrated your best friend’s birthday that very weekend, which meant lots of alcohol and very little sleep.

So when the alarm on your bedside table rang that morning, you didn’t wake up.

When you prepared boiled water for your morning tea, the kettle partially exploded and leaked all over your kitchen floor, and you burnt your fingers while cleaning up the mess.

When you walked into the shower, the water was frozen, and no matter what you tried you couldn’t manage to get warm water, so you took a cold shower in a hurry.

You searched for your helmet for no less than five minutes in the mess that was your house, and when you finally walked out of your house and to your old motorcycle, it took you three attempts to turn it on. Clearly, your old bike was starting to be too old to be reliable. You just hoped it would get you to your workplace.

It was going to be a bad day, and you knew it. The kind of day during which all you wanted to do was to crawl back under the covers and remain there hidden until the day was finally over.

You took a look at your watch.

You were 15 minutes late already. You could count on your boss’s fury as well.

Wonderful…

You stopped at a red light, putting your foot down on the ground to keep your balance on your bike.

You looked around you, watching the men and women working at the City hurrying towards their office, walking into the tall buildings covered with shining glass. And at the sight of their hurried pace, you found yourself wishing for some holidays.

The traffic light turned green again and you forced your bike forwards again, the loud sound of the roaring engines making your ears painful.

You were lost in thought when you arrived at the next intersection and you didn’t notice the sign that ordered you to stop. But out of habits you took a look on your left to check the cars that could be coming from there.

When you saw the dark car coming your way it was already too late and you knew it…

You slowed down as much as you could and turned your bike frantically to avoid the car but all you managed to do was to fall.

And you closed your eyes as you felt yourself irremediably lose your balance, thinking it was the end.

The day was really shitty…

You heard the shrieking noise of breaks, and you hit the ground quite violently, landing on your wrist. You rolled for a few meters and then lied still on your back, not daring to move.

You heard the sharp noise of a car door being closed in a hurry, and running footsteps heading towards you.

Were you dead?

“Oh fucking shit…”

His voice was low and warm. If you were dead, you hadn’t expected that the first words that would be spoken to you in Heaven would be curse words.

At least the voice you heard sounded sexy. If you were to be welcomed to Heaven, better be by some good-looking guy.

You heard him kneeling down next to you.

“Hey, can you hear me?” he asked.

You were too afraid to move for now, or to open your eyes, or to speak. You heard his voice shaking with panic.

“Oh God… Please, don’t be dead…”

Wait a second… that meant that you were _not_ dead… right?

You heard him fumbling with his coat and cursing under his breath.

Your eyelids fluttered and opened, and all you could see was a grey sky. How could there be rain clouds in Heaven? Unless you had landed in Hell instead…

Shitty day till the end…

Or perhaps it was just the sign that you weren’t dead after all.

But the next second, there was a man bending above you, staring right at you. You blinked, and he heaved a deep sigh, clearly reassured.

You recognized him the second your eyes met his dark glance.

Holy shit…

Okay, you were definitely dead. No other logical explanation. You were dead and were welcomed to Heaven by a short haired version of King Caspian.

This made total sense.

“Can you hear me?” he asked again.

You nodded slowly, too shocked to speak.

You had to admit that he was even more handsome in real than on a movie screen…

“I’m calling for help, don’t worry,” he said, his tone trying to be reassuring despite the obvious fear that was shaking his voice. “It’s gonna be alright.”

You cleared your throat.

“Am I dead?” you asked in a trembling and hoarse voice.

He smiled.

“No, you’re not dead.”

“You’re sure?”

He chuckled.

“Yeah, I’m sure. I know I’m not dead, so neither are you.”

You heaved a deep, relieved sigh.

Thank. God.

All the while his eyes had remained fixed on you, and the chocolate brown orbs were so intense you thought you were about to faint.

Of course, you had to have an accident involving a fucking movie star. Of course…

“I’m Ben, by the way,” he said.

“Y/N.”

You took a look around you, but the street was completely deserted. You made a movement to sit up, but he gently held you down, putting his hand on your shoulder.

“No, no, no. You shouldn’t sit up,” he said.

“I don’t think I’m hurt.”

“Lay down,” he repeated.

He quickly scanned your body, and you guessed that he was looking for any possible wound. But no blood was escaping from you. He was still pressing his iPhone against his ear, as he had surely been put on hold.

“You’re sure you’re unhurt?” he asked you.

“My wrist is painful, that’s all,” you answered.

“Okay…”

But he was interrupted as someone was speaking to him on the phone.

You used the time he was leading his conversation on the phone to take a closer look at him, but the verdict didn’t change.

This guy was hot as hell.

And even if his expression made you think that he was probably a good man, his deep, hypnotic glance made you smell danger as well. You could fall hard for these eyes, and you knew it. So better be careful with this one…

He hung up the phone and put it back in the pocket of his leather jacket.

“They’re on their way,” he said. “I’ll wait with you, okay?”

You nodded, trying to sit up again.

“You mustn’t…” he started.

“The ground is not particularly comfortable, you know?” you interrupted him with a smile.

And as you were already struggling to rise on your own anyway, he helped you sitting up.

“You’re okay?” he asked one more time.

You struggled to take off your helmet with only one hand, and heaved a relieved sigh once you were finally freed from the piece of equipment.

“I’m fine,” you nodded. “I must have twisted my wrist, that’s all,” you told him.

But he didn’t reply. He was intensely staring at you, examining your face that had been mostly hidden by your helmet before. You noticed that his lips were slightly parted now.

He shook himself.

“So… are you okay?”

You couldn’t refrain a smile. Clearly, he hadn’t been paying much attention at what you had said.

“I think I’ve twisted my wrist,” you repeated.

He nodded.

“You want to take a look?” he proposed.

You shrugged.

“Why not?”

He helped you take of your glove, his long fingers carefully pulling on the cloth.

Your wrist was swollen and red.

“Doesn’t look very good,” you mumbled.

“Could be worse, I reckon.”

You looked around and spotted your bike further down the little street. And even from afar, you could see that it couldn’t be repaired. It had hit a lamppost, it was beyond hope.

“Sorry about your bike,” he said, reading the disappointment on your face.

You shrugged. What else could you do anyway?

Suddenly, the piercing sound of an ambulance closing on you cut the air.

Soon, two men were kneeling down next to you. They took a look at you wrist, and when you winced as they touched the skin of your articulation, they both knew what to do.

“You need to go to hospital,” one of them told you slowly, as if he was talking to a young child, “to see if this is broken or just twisted, okay?”

You nodded, and Ben and him helped you to get back on your feet, and to reach the ambulance.

Ben made a movement to climb in after you, but the paramedic stopped him.

“You can drive, right?” he asked Ben, who nodded in response. “Then follow us, okay?”

Ben looked at you, his intense eyes fixed upon your own, and you felt a strange sensation in your stomach.

“I’ll be right behind. Is that okay?” he asked you.

You smiled.

“I reckon that their hands are more competent than yours now anyway,” you teased.

He nodded, smiling back at you, before striding towards his car.

———————————————————————————————————–

At the hospital you were almost immediately taken care of by a doctor that took a quick look at your wrist and made you do a few tests to be sure you had no other traumas anywhere. But once he was sure that only your wrist had been impacted by the accident, he was reassuring. You needed an X-ray to be sure that it wasn’t broken, but he was optimistic. He accompanied you back into the waiting room, where no less than twenty people were already waiting, and amongst them, Ben was nervously pacing.

“So? What did he say?” he asked you as you leaned against the wall next to him.

“It’s just my wrist, and he was pretty reassuring about it,” you answered. “I’ll be just fine. I just need to wait for an X-ray.”

A contagious grin appeared on his face.

“That’s wonderful,” he said.

You looked down at your feet. This man was too dangerous for your heart, and you knew it.

But the truth was, you didn’t really care.

Still, you knew you had to be careful.

“I’ll be just fine,” you told him. “And I’m sure you have better things to do than to stay here with me.”

He shrugged, deciding not to go to this meeting with his agent. He would just send her a text to tell her he couldn’t come. He knew she would be mad at him, but he couldn’t find a way to care.

“You’re not going to stay here alone,” he argued. “Do you want me to call someone for you?”

You shook your head. If your best friend received a call from Ben Barnes she would either faint, either scream at him to fuck off. Awful reaction in both cases…

“I’ll be just fine,” you answered. “Thank you, that’s very kind of you. But you should go.”

Ben nodded slowly, looking down at his feet, but he didn’t make any movement towards the door.

“Do you want me to leave?” he asked softly.

“It’s not the point,” you replied.

“It is, though.”

You intensely looked at each other, and it was suddenly harder for you to breathe.

“I don’t want you to go,” you admitted.

How on Earth were you supposed to lie to him when he looked at you _that_ way?

He grinned.

“It’s settled then.”

He nodded towards an empty chair.

“You want to sit down?” he asked.

But you shook your head.

“I’m fine,” you answered.

“It’s a weird way to meet someone,” he smiled after a short silence.

“It is,” you nodded.

“I reckon we deserve a real introduction.”

He completely turned towards you, and offered you his open hand.

“Hi, I’m Ben Barnes.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle as you took the hand he was offering you.

“Y/N Y/L/N.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too. Although… these are not the best circumstances.”

You both smiled, finally letting go of each other’s hand, and none of you spoke for a while, until Ben would clear his throat.

“And… despite these circumstances… would you give me your number?”

You stared at him, biting fiercely your lower lip.

“I mean… in case your insurance would need to contact me about your bike or… something,” he went on, clearly disappointed by your silence.

A small smile formed on your lips.

“Don’t you think that _you_ should give me your number for the insurance?”

He shrugged.

“Okay, I’ll give you mine, then.”

You laughed.

“Is that your strategy then? You try to kill all the women you want to ask for a date?”

He let out an earnest laugh, and it seemed that the sun shone a bit more into the room all of a sudden. You didn’t fail to notice his blushing cheeks though.

“First… Let’s be clear on one thing,” he replied, his cheeks still flushed. “I’ve never tried to kill you. You’re the one who didn’t stop.”

You laughed.

“I didn’t see the sign,” you confessed.

“So actually, if someone here tried to kill the other, it’s you. You actually almost kill me. And none of this mess is my fault.”

“Alright, alright… You may have a point.”

“And I’ve never said that I wanted to ask you for a date.”

You intensely stared at him.

“But that’s what you meant to do, wasn’t it?” you asked, your voice softer now, almost a whisper.

His stare was just as intense as your own.

“Yes, that’s what I meant to do,” he earnestly confessed.

You kept staring at each other for a moment, both of you silent.

“So? What do you say?” he asked.

But before you could answer, the doctor was back and was calling for you.

And when you turned around to look at Ben as the doctor guided you out of the waiting room, you couldn’t refrain a proud smile.

Ben was blushing fiercely and running a hand in his dark hair.

Ben Barnes wanted to have a date with _you_ …

Maybe that day wasn’t so bad after all…

———————————————————————————————————–

Your wrist was just twisted, not broken. You had to wear a brace for three weeks and wouldn’t go to work until next week and you would probably need a bit of reeducation, but it was nothing your body couldn’t handle. It could have been much worse, and you knew it. You guessed that you had been lucky.

And when you saw Ben still waiting for you in the gloomy room, then you _knew_ you had been lucky.

He offered to drive you home and you didn’t even try to refuse.

So you climbed into his black car and you enjoyed the ride, the two of you joking and chatting, the conversation flowing easily between the two of you.

He parked his car before your home, and when you looked at the time, you realized it was already too late for lunch. The sun of June was shining bright, the end of Spring particularly warm this year for London.

“Here you are,” Ben said softly.

And you could hear in his voice that he didn’t want you to leave.

“I’m going back in L.A. for work in a couple of weeks,” he went on. “And I’ll probably be gone for several weeks. But… is there any chance that I could see you again when I’m back in town?”

You intensely stared at each other, while you hesitated.

“And if it can reassure you,” Ben continued, “I’m hoping that we could visit another part of London than one of its hospitals this time.”

You both laughed, and you chased a lock of your hair behind your ear, thinking hard.

“You’re pretty insistent in asking for my number,” you teased, stalling.

You bit your lower lip, at war with yourself.

“I never got your answer at the hospital,” he pointed out.

“You’re insistent all the same.”

“Only when I _really_ want something.”

You bit your lip harder. But he looked at the street before him all of a sudden, tearing his dark eyes away from yours.

“Unless you already have someone of course…”

But you shook your head.

“I’m single,” you answered.

He stared at you again.

“So am I,” he reassured you.

You didn’t know what to answer.

He was kind and charming, and acted like a gentleman, and he was without a doubt the most handsome man you had ever talked to.

But how many women had fallen for this contagious smile and dark eyes of his?

Many, without a doubt.

And yet he seemed to be so kind and caring…

“So… what do you say?” he asked.

Your brain was saying no.

Your heart was saying yes.

But you had never followed your brain until now, so why start today?

You picked up a pen from your handbag and took his hand. And you wrote your number in his palm.

“Anyway, you already know my name and my address,” you answered to his triumphant grin. “I’m sure you would have been clever enough to find number as well.”

“Why give it to me then?”

You shrugged.

“Maybe I don’t want to wait until you come back for you to call me.”

His grin doubled in size, and you couldn’t help but blush.

“Thank you, for staying with me,” you said, suddenly shy. “It was a pleasure to meet you.”

“Really… the pleasure was all mine,” he replied, and you knew he meant it.

“Goodbye, Ben.”

“Goodbye, Y/N.”

You fought against yourself not to look back at him as you got out of his car and walked to your house and opened the front door.

And so you didn’t see the grin that was plastered on his face.

You never learned that he seized his phone as soon as you had closed the door of your house behind you, ignoring all his agent’s messages, to enter your number in his phone, in case the ink would be erased as he drove home. You never learned that he was on a little cloud for the rest of the day.

Because it was a really good day, indeed…


	2. Rain Accident

There were dark clouds above you, just like the day you had first met. You walked down the busy streets of London, straightening your dress.   
You were nervous.  
This whole thing made you nervous.  
Ben had called you the day after your accident. He had been charming, asking how you were, before asking if you were free for lunch two days later.  
You didn’t dare to think about this as a date, although you knew it was a date.  
If it hadn’t been a date, you wouldn’t have taken so much care choosing your dress and taming your wild hair in the first place.  
You turned around a corner, wincing at the loud sound of a red bus passing next to you. The streets were busy that day, filled with noises and smells of food and petrol. You finally spotted the restaurant Ben had invited you to.   
You took a deep breath as you rested your hand on the doorknob, and opened the heavy door.  
It smelled good inside. Spices and sugar. A touch of mint was flying in the air. You looked around, trying to spot Ben.  
And indeed, he had already arrived.   
He was talking to someone from the restaurant, and… he seemed pissed off.  
You walked closer to him, and he didn’t notice you at first, still talking angrily with the waiter.  
“And what am I supposed to do now?” he asked angrily, though his voice was low. “I’ve booked a table here, and now it’s too late to go anywhere else.”  
“I’m so sorry, sir,” the waiter apologized for what seemed to be the tenth time. “But we don’t have any table for you. I’m sorry, there’s been a confusion, and there’s nothing I can do. You can still wait for a table to be free.”  
Ben heaved a sigh, before finally noticing the woman standing behind him.  
He turned towards you, drinking you in as his eyes ran up and down your body.  
“Hi,” you smiled.  
“Hi,” he breathed.  
“Is there a problem?” you asked, although you had already understood the problem.  
“We don’t have a table,” Ben said, an apologetic expression on his face. “Although, I did call to book one.”  
He looked at the waiter again, and merely glared at him.  
“Well then… let’s go somewhere else,” you proposed.  
“I’m not sure there will be room for us left in any good restaurant in this part of town,” Ben replied.  
“Then we’ll go in a bad one,” you smiled.  
He rolled his eyes.  
“I’m not going to let that happen,” he replied.  
“Well… we don’t have any table here anyway, so… just… let’s go somewhere else. We will probably not eat before ages anyway if we stay here.”  
He nodded, before walking to the door, merely nodding to the waiter as he excited the room with you.  
He heaved a sigh as he walked into the street, and you looked more carefully at his white shirt, and leathered jacket, and dark jeans…  
He really was handsome…  
You felt butterflies shaking your stomach.  
“I’m sorry about all this,” he said, blushing slightly, a sheepish expression on his face.   
“It’s just a table in a restaurant, you know?” you smiled reassuringly.  
“I had prepared everything, really I had.”  
“I believe you. And it’s okay.”  
He ran a hand through his hair, and you found yourself craving for the feeling of his hair on your fingers too.  
You shook yourself out of your thoughts.  
“Let’s just… try to find something to eat,” he said, starting to walk in a random direction.  
You took a few steps in silence, before he would turn towards you again.  
“So? How’s your wrist?” he asked.  
You showed him the dark brace that covered your wrist and most of your hand.  
“Is it still painful?” he asked, earnestly concerned.  
“Not really. Not if I don’t try to use my hand too much.”  
“Well… I’m glad it’s not too serious.”  
“I’ve seen worse. Although, I feel super sexy with it,” you joked.  
He laughed.  
“You’re beautiful,” he said, looking to the street before him, blushing hard.  
And you blushed just as fiercely as he did.  
You tried three different restaurants, but they were all full. And Ben was desperate.  
It was kind of fun, really, the way he was nervous, the way he was trying to make you spend a good time…  
The way he obviously wanted this date to work well.  
But between the two of you the conversation was easy. You were not nervous anymore, just… content.  
You were content to walk with him through the busy streets you had walked a thousand times before. But it felt different to cross them with him by your side somehow.  
You arrived near the Tower Bridge, and you were starting to get famished.  
“You know what?” you proposed, stopping your walk. “Let’s just buy fish and chips.”  
He raised an eyebrow.  
“You want to eat fish and chips?” he asked, completely taken aback.  
“Why? You don’t like fish and chips?”  
“I… I love fish and chips,” he chuckled.  
“Then let’s just buy some and eat near the Thames, what do you think?”  
He nodded, staring intensely at you. The clouds above your head were letting pass only a fraction of the sunlight, and under this light, his eyes were almost black.  
“It’s more than fine by me,” he nodded.  
You walked towards your favourite fish and chips, and you were soon eating, sitting by the riverbanks.  
“I have to admit that I had not planned for fish and chips and beer for our first date but… it’s interesting,” he said with an amused smile.  
“Oh… I see,” you said, a teasing glint shining in your eyes. “You don’t like simple dates?”  
He smiled.  
“I like simple dates. I like simple things in general. But I’ve noticed lately that most people don’t.”  
“Well, to be honest,” you answered. “I prefer to have a beer in a cool pub than to go in the best restaurant in town.”  
He grinned.  
“Me too.”  
“So you’re okay with the fish and chips, beer menu?”  
He laughed.  
“I’m more than happy with it. I hadn’t eaten fish and chips in ages.”  
“Why that? I eat fish and chips at least twice a month.”  
He shrugged.  
“I live in L.A.,” he answered. “And you don’t have fish and chips in the U.S.”  
“What are you doing in London then?” you asked, swallowing a mouthful of fish.  
“I was born here. My family lives here. My parents and my little brother. So I try to come visit them whenever I can.”  
“Why did you choose to go live in L.A. in the first place?”  
“Work.”  
You drank up a gulp of your beer, hesitating.  
You hadn’t told him yet that you had recognized him. And you hadn’t brought up the subject of him being an actor. You didn’t want him to think that you were here because he was famous, because it wasn’t true. You were here because you liked him. Because he was funny, and handsome, and kind…  
You were here for Ben, not for Ben Barnes.  
So you chose to fake ignorance about his job.  
“And what do you do for a living?” you asked.  
You saw him smile, looking at his food.  
And you knew he was glad at the thought that you didn’t know who he was.  
“I’m an actor,” he answered, smiling at you.  
“Really? And what do you do? Theaters stuff or movies stuff?”  
“Mostly movies or series. It’s been years since I haven’t been on a stage.”  
“And you don’t miss it?”  
“I do actually. I miss it very much. But… for now, I didn’t have a good occasion to go back working in a theater so… I’m being patient. And it’s tough, you know? To go every evening to play the same scenes. You can’t allow yourself to be tired, or sick or anything. Whatever happens in your life, you have to be on stage every night, because people have bought tickets to see your play. It asks lots of work, dedication and time. So, you have to like the project you’re going to be working on when you do something so demanding.”  
You smiled. He spoke about his work like it was his passion. Actually, you were sure it was.  
For the next hour, you remained sitting there, holding on your empty bottles, talking.  
He asked you a hundred questions, and you did just the same.  
And the more you were talking together, the more you didn’t want this moment to end.  
Because he was such a laugh, and he was sweet, and actually interested in learning to know you, and… he seemed to be kind and caring.  
And it had been a very long time since you had met someone of the kind.  
So when silence finally settled between the two of you, you proposed to go to Kensington Gardens.  
“It’s my favourite place in town,” you told him.  
“Really?” he asked.  
You nodded, walking with him toward the Tube.  
“What’s yours?”  
“Don’t think I’m boring,” he smiled, “but… I love the British Museum.”  
“Really?”  
“I used to go often with my parents when I was little. We lived at Wimbledon, and we would go there at least once a month. I don’t know I just… love it.”  
“I love it too,” you smiled.  
You exchanged a grin.  
“Well, if we’re going to your favourite place today,” Ben said slowly as you sat into the Tube. “Maybe next time, we can go to my favourite place in town.”  
You raised an eyebrow.  
“Are you actually asking me for a new date when we haven’t even finished this one?” you asked.  
He shrugged.  
“Maybe I don’t want to be tortured anymore by not knowing if you’ll want to see me again or not,” he breathed, looking by the window to flee your gaze.  
You couldn’t refrain a smile.  
“But next time we eat Chinese food,” you said.  
He stared at you, grinning.  
“That’s a deal.”  
———————————————————————————————————–  
“What? You really broke your toe?”  
“Yep.”  
“Why didn’t you tell them?”  
“I broke my toe just by… tripping over nothing. I was so ashamed of myself.”  
You laughed. An uncontrollable wave of euphoria.   
It had been a very long time since you had laughed that much, and judging by the grin that was stuck on his face, it was probably the same for him.  
“It must have been so painful,” you hiccupped as you tried to calm down.  
“It was hell,” he nodded, holding his side. “It was so painful.”  
You let yourself fall back on the grass, laughing too much, holding your painful stomach.  
The grass had been burnt by the warm sun, and was now yellowish, and not so soft under your skin. But you didn’t really care. You could hear the ducks swimming in the water a few feet away from you. Down the water, two children were feeding them with their grandmother, throwing old bread at the birds. They were laughing hard too.   
You finally calmed down, looking up at the clouds above you. They were dark and menacing. You knew it would soon rain. Storms were frequent at this period of the year after all.  
You felt Ben’s stare upon you, and you looked up at him.   
He had a dreamy smile on his lips as his eyes traveled from your feet to your own gaze. His smile widened as his eyes met yours.  
You looked back at the clouds, feeling yourself blushing.  
You suddenly pointed out at the sky.  
“This one looks like an octopus,” you said.  
He raised an eyebrow, his lips curving up even more in an amused grin.  
“You mean the clouds?” he asked.  
“Yes, this one. Look.”  
“How old are you?” he laughed.  
“You will learn that you are never too old to search for shapes in the clouds. And this piece of wisdom is the key to happiness.”  
“How generous of you to share it with me.”  
“You’re welcome.”  
He looked up at the clouds, chuckling.  
“So… where is this octopus of yours?” he asked.  
“There,” you indicated again, pointing at the cloud.  
He frowned, tilting his head to the side.  
“It looks more like a… teddy bear to me.”  
You laughed.  
“That’s because you’re not looking at the right cloud, the octopus is more on the right.”  
But he frowned, still not seeing it.  
You rolled your eyes.  
“Either you have no imagination, either you’re blind,” you teased him.  
He lied down next to you.  
“Where is it?” he asked again.  
Your shoulders were touching, and your faces were so close, when he turned his face to you, you could feel his breath on your cheek.  
You could barely breathe.  
“There,” you said again, pointing at the cloud one more time, and this time he spotted it.  
“It does look a lot like an octopus.”  
You nodded.  
“Told you.”  
You looked at each other again, and you could feel that his nearness was making your breathing more laboured.  
“How old are we to find ourselves in a situation like that?” you asked, your voice just a whisper that quickly got lost in the wind.  
“Probably way too old,” he answered.  
You caught him glimpsing at your mouth, and when he looked up at you again, he was biting his lower lip.  
The tension between the two of you was so great, you didn’t understand why it didn’t turn into visible electricity.   
He glimpsed at your lips again…  
But then, something very cold hit your cheek.  
You started, touching your cheek. It was wet…  
Another raindrop hit your cheek, and then another and…  
“Oh shit…” Ben laughed, helping you getting up.  
He took your hand and you both ran through the park, ignoring the flowers in full bloom and the rushing people around you.  
You were both laughing, laughing so hard it was complicated for the two of you to run pass the gates of Kensington Gardens.   
You let Ben guide you through the streets, not even paying attention at where he was taking you. You trusted him enough to just let him pull you in the direction he had chosen.  
You finally noticed that he was running after a bus.   
You climbed inside, laughing, completely soaked.  
“Where is it going?” you asked him, searching for the name of the line in the bus.  
He looked cautiously at you.  
“Well I thought I could give you ride. To get you home,” he said slowly.  
You intensely stared at him.  
“So it’s passing by your home?”  
“By my flat, yeah. It’s not very long to go there with this bus.”  
You nodded slowly.  
But he didn’t want to scare you away.  
“I just want to give you a ride home, instead of letting you get soaked.”  
You nodded again.  
“Alright then.”  
He gave you a warm smile, and you both remained silent for the rest of the trip to his flat. You ran as fast as you could to conquer the distance between the bus and his home, the raindrops still falling hard. And when he opened the door to you, you were both laughing again.  
You walked towards the lift.  
“I just pick up my car keys, okay?” he told you, and you nodded.  
You climbed up to the third floor, and he guided you to his flat.  
It was a very large space, kitchen and living room gathered into one room. The decoration was modern and yet warm and welcoming. You noticed a few papers and books splayed here and there through the room.  
It looked quite a lot like him.   
“Do you want to drink something to warm you up? Tea or something?” he proposed.  
“No, I’m fine, thanks.”  
He nodded.  
“I’ll give you a towel though, ‘cause you really are soaked,” he smiled, walking across the apartment.  
“I don’t reckon you look better than I do,” you laughed.  
He reappeared seconds later with a towel for you, walking back to you as he dried his hair. He threw his own towel on the sofa as he passed by, looking at you again.  
You hadn’t moved an inch since you had come inside, and Ben could feel your discomfort.   
You were not the kind of girl to follow a man to his apartment after just one date. Even if the man in question was a very handsome and charming British actor.  
He hurried towards you again, and shed the towel upon your shoulders.  
“Here you go,” he said softly, his hands still resting on your upper arms.  
The same tension than in the park reappeared between the two of you, and for a moment, you were both perfectly still, staring at each other.  
But then his dark eyes were getting closer and closer to your own, as he leaned down to kiss you.  
You gasped, and he froze, still staring into your eyes. His hand raised to come resting on your cheek, and his thumb brushed your lower lip.  
“Do you want me to stop?” he asked in a shaking breath.  
“I’m not sure,” you earnestly answered.  
He slowly leaned forward, the space between the two of you shrinking more and more by the second…  
You closed your eyes as his lips brushed against yours. You took a sharp intake of breath at the sensation of his lips slowly being pressed against your own, but you didn’t push him away.  
He pulled away, leaving his kiss still shy on your lips, hesitant, as if he was scared you would run away from him if he went further.  
But you were too intoxicated already to run away.  
And when you opened your eyes, smiling, he knew you wouldn’t push him away if he kissed you again.  
And so a second later, you found yourself being pressed against the front door, wrapping your arms around his neck and losing a hand in his dark hair.  
The kiss was tender and yet hungry, and you held tightly on his shoulder, your legs feeling very weak all of a sudden.  
When you finally broke the kiss, gasping for air, there was an amazed grin on your face. And when you opened your eyes to dive into his chocolate brown irises, you saw that he had just the same grin plastered on his face.  
Till now, you hadn’t been aware that a simple kiss could move you to your soul.  
You both chuckled, blushing hard. He released slightly his hold on your hips, leaving more space between your bodies again.  
“The car keys,” he nodded, and you could tell that the gentleman switch in his brain had been switched again, as he looked for his car keys in the pockets of a nearby jacket.  
“I have something to confess,” you said slowly.  
Because you didn’t think it was a good thing to build a relationship on a lie. And after a kiss like that, there was no way you were going with something less than a serious relationship.  
“I’m all ears,” he nodded, finally finding the right keys.  
“I’m a huge Narnia fan.”  
His eyebrows arched up in surprise.  
“Here, I said it,” you breathed, nervously running a hand through your hair.  
“So… you had recognized me since the beginning, right?” he asked, and you could see that he seemed a bit disappointed.  
“Yes, I had,” you nodded.  
“Why didn’t you just tell me so then?”  
You heaved a sigh.  
“I… I don’t know,” you struggled to explain what had happened in your mind. “I just… didn’t want you to think that I accepted to have a date with you because you’re an actor. Because it’s not why I accepted at all. I just like you.”  
You fiercely blushed, and a smile crept up his lips, but he didn’t say a thing.  
“But now that… this happened,” you said, gesturing to the two of you, and it wasn’t hard for him to understand that you were talking about your kiss. “I just… I don’t think it’s a good idea to start a relationship on a lie, so…”  
You stared at him, but he seemed amused now.  
“Alright,” he nodded. “It’s okay.”  
“Is it?”  
He nodded.  
“Can you still drive me home?” you asked.  
But he merely laughed in response, nodding his head.  
You remained mostly silent during the trip to your home. It wasn’t raining anymore, although the streets of London were now wet and slippery. Only when he had parked his car before your house did Ben speak again.  
“I’ve spent a very good afternoon,” he smiled.  
“Me too,” you nodded.  
“Kind of crazy, but…”  
“Let’s say that basically… nothing went according to plan.”  
“No, absolutely nothing,” he laughed.  
“I still enjoyed it a lot though.”  
“Me too.”  
You stared at each other for a moment, before you would give him a warm smile.  
“Goodbye Ben,” you said.  
“Goodbye Y/N.”  
You opened the door, unaware of the fact that Ben was hesitating, battling with himself.  
But screw the 24 hours before calling again…  
“Y/N,” he called before you could close the door.  
“Hmm?”  
“Are you free tomorrow afternoon? You owe me a visit of the British Museum, remember?”  
You grinned.  
“I’m free, yeah,” you nodded.  
“Great. Let’s see each other at the Museum then. At 2?”  
“Alright then.”  
You both grinned again, and you finally walked home.  
You rested your head against your front door as you closed it behind you, throwing your shoes across the hall, a dreamy smile on your face.  
This had been a pretty strange date, with lots of unplanned things going on. Actually, you couldn’t remember any date that had happened with so many things going wrong :  
\- Your table being given to someone else  
\- Three more restaurants refusing you  
\- 45 minutes of walking to find food  
\- Ending up with fish and chips and a beer  
\- A thunder storm happening in the middle of your date  
\- You being soaked wet…  
But you couldn’t remember any better date either…


	3. Flour Accident

You rested your head on his shoulder, your fingers intertwined. You walked down the alley, watching the roman statues and heading towards the Egyptian section. It felt natural, to walk with him by your side. He kept on making silly jokes that always made you laugh. He dropped sweet kisses on your hair and your forehead.

You had to admit that nothing had ever felt so easy before…

“They’re a bit scary, don’t you think?” you said, as you walked before two sarcophagi.

“I love their beards,” Ben replied. “Do you think I should let mine grow like that?”

“Let me think… no.”

You both laughed.

“I mean… they’re coffins,” you went on. “Don’t you think that it’s weird to expose them?”

Â “Guess we shouldn’t go see any real mummy…”

“Unless you want me to run away.”

“I have to admit that I don’t like them much either.”

“I don’t think we should expose them like that.”

“Guess you’re right.”

“Imagine if someone exposed your coffin in a few thousands of years… how weird it would be…”

“It’s the problem with being famous. It never really leaves you. Maybe you’re right and I’ll be condemned to be stared at even after I die…”

You rolled your eyes, walking in a new corridor and leaving the creepy coffins behind you.

“Does that bother you sometimes?” you asked, watching the statues. “To be famous I mean.”

“I’m not famous enough to be much bothered by it I reckon,” he answered with a smile. “I mean… it’s rather rare that someone recognizes me in the street.”

“Or perhaps it’s because you don’t look the same when you work and on a daily bases.”

“I still have the same face,” Ben laughed.

“You don’t always wear a sword though.”

He shrugged.

“Not that it bothers me to be able to walk out in the street without being asked for selfies every five seconds,” he said.

“Do you ever use it with girls?”

He frowned, raising an eyebrow.

“Did I use it with you?” he replied.

You chuckled.

“No… but I guess some men would use it as an argument.”

“I don’t reckon it’s a good argument though.”

You tightened your hold on his hand.

“No, me neither,” you shook your head.

“Would it work on you?” he asked, teasing.

“Absolutely not,” you laughed.

“I should stick to the normal English guy then, right?”

“It would work better if you did, yeah.”

You exchanged a smile and walked back to the main hall, under the glass roof, and Ben cleared his throat.

“I propose that we stop our wonderful walk here and try to find some food because I’m honestly starving.”

“I agree, I’m starving too,” you nodded.

“Alright, I know a very good Chinese restaurant not very far from here.”

“As long as finding a restaurant is not as complicated as it was for our last date?”

“Why do I feel like I’m going to hear about that for a _long_ while…”

“I like teasing,” you admitted, slightly blushing.

“I had noticed that.”

You walked out of the immense building, and Ben guided you throughout the adjacent streets, his fingers never leaving yours.

And indeed you were soon sitting at a table in a little Chinese restaurant. And the conversation was going on smoothly all along.

“I can’t believe that you can’t dance,” you said, shaking your head.

“I can’t. Perhaps it’s some kind of trauma or something,” Ben replied, laughing.

“I can’t believe you.”

“Why not?”

“Because you look… like someone who can dance.”

“I can’t. Do you want a demonstration?”

“I’d love one.”

“Maybe later. I don’t really want to look ridiculous in front of an entire restaurant.”

“There aren’t so many people in here though.”

“Okay, let me say that again. I’m not drunk enough to make a demonstration. And you might get scared and run away once you’ve seen me trying to dance.”

You laughed, drinking some water.

“I think you’ll need more than that to scare me though.”

“You definitely need a demonstration.”

You picked up your fortune cookie, and broke it open.

“What does it say?” Ben asked.

“ _‘The rainbow shines after the rain.’_ Very poetic.”

“And mysterious… do you think it could apply to you?”

“Well, as I was almost killed buy the guy I’m currently dating, I guess… it means that he won’t try to kill me again.”

Ben rolled his eyes.

“Again, my car didn’t even touch you, you fell on your own.”

“I know, I’m kidding,” you laughed, reaching for his hand across the table.

You nodded towards his own cookie.

“What does yours say?”

He broke the biscuit, eating a piece of it before unfolding the little scroll.

“ _'Destiny often strikes by accident.’_ ”

He smiled.

“Do you understand what that means?” you asked.

“I think I do,” Ben nodded.

You silently encouraged him to continue.

“Well… we met because you had an accident…”

You rolled your eyes.

“I don’t believe in destiny and things like that.”

“I’m not the one who is eager to read predictions in Chinese cookies,” he answered, smiling mischievously.

“Very funny,” you replied.

You checked your watch for the third time in less than ten minutes.

“You need to go somewhere?” Ben asked slowly, his smile slowly fading. “Or you’re bored?”

“I’m not bored, Ben,” you smiled.

His cheeks slightly reddened.

“So you have somewhere to go?” he asked.

“I need to babysit for my niece,” you nodded. “Tonight at 9.”

“But it’s only 2 pm…”

“I’ve promised her I would bake a cake for her. But with my wrist… It might get complicated. So I’ll need the help of my neighbour who goes to work at 3 pm.”

“That’s why you asked to go to the Museum earlier than we had first planed then…” he nodded.

“Yep, my sister called me just yesterday night, and now I have to find a way to bake.”

“I could help,” Ben offered.

“You’re an awful dancer but you can bake?”

“Exactly. I can’t have only flaws, can I?”

“I’d love some help.”

“Your kitchen or mine?” he asked with a smirk.

“Mine.”

—————————————————————————————-

“Where are the eggs?”

You pointed at the fridge behind you.

“What kind of cake do you want to bake?” Ben asked you.

“Cookies?”

“Perfect. I’m the king of cookies.”

“I bet you’re the king to eat them rather than cook them though,” you joked.

“Are you challenging me? Because I can bake the best cookies you’ve ever eaten.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Then I guess I’ll have to prove you wrong.”

You started to take your brace off, but Ben stopped you.

“I’m here to make sure that you don’t touch any spoon,” he admonished.

So you let him bake in your stead, merely adding a few things to the recipe.

“So…” you said slowly, adding chocolate into one of the bowls. “You’re leaving in just a few days, right?”

Ben cautiously looked at you.

“I have to go back to L.A. for a couple of weeks,” he nodded.

“And… then?”

“Then… I’m supposed to stay there.”

You stared at him for a few seconds, before looking down at the bowl again.

“I see…” you breathed.

“Although… I don’t have anything to do in California after these two weeks… So maybe I could… come back here for a while?”

“Really?”

He leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“I could let myself be convinced.”

He dropped a peck on your cheek.

“Unless you’d prefer that I stay in the U.S?” he added.

“No,” you shook your head.

“Right… so if I come back to London… could you accept to see me again?”

His voice was slow and cautious now, as if he dreaded your answer. He was blushing slightly, looking down at the bowl as well now.

“Well… I don’t know,” you said slowly.

When you looked at each other you could see fear in his eyes.

“Only if I can steal one of your cookies,” you smiled.

He laughed, taking your hand in his, your fingers covered with flour.

“You can steal as many cookies as you’d like,” he said.

Slowly, he leaned down, the space between your lips slowly shrinking… until they collided.

He tasted like sugar and cigarettes…

Hell… he tasted like sin…

You gripped his white shirt to prevent yourself from falling, your knees too weak to support your weight anymore, and Ben pressed you against the wooden table. His hands moved up to your hair, and you pressed yourself against him, your hands grazing the shape of his shoulder throughout the fabric of his clothes.

When he broke the kiss, both of you out of breath, a low chuckle shook his chest.

“What?” you breathed.

He rested his forehead against yours.

“I put flour in your hair,” he smiled.

You laughed as well, shrugging.

“It doesn’t matter.”

He didn’t see your hand snaking behind you and plunging inside a bowl full of flour.

“I guess…” you said slowly, as Ben rested his hands on your waist, bringing his lips closer to yours again. “That I should give you the same treatment.”

He slightly pulled away, frowning.

But the next second you were running your hand covered with flour through his dark hair, and all he could do was arched his eyebrows in surprise as you started to laugh uncontrollably, looking at his strands of hair now stained with white.

“You don’t want to play this game with me,” he warned you.

“Really? Let me guess,” you said, still laughing. “You’re not only the king of cookies, you’re also the king of flour fight?”

“Exactly.”

Before you could react he had grabbed the bowl behind you and thrown a handful of the white powder at you.

You gasped, laughing, as he threw some more flour at you, soon emptying the whole bowl upon your head.

But then your hand found the bag of flour, and he looked cautiously at you.

“Y/N…” he said slowly, fighting against a smile. “Don’t do anything stupid…”

But before he could end his sentence, he was covered with flour.

You staggered backwards, fighting against Ben as he tried to take the flour from you, both of you laughing hard, until you hit the sink behind you.

He finally grabbed the bag full of your ammunitions and threw it back on the table behind him, far away from your grasp.

Before you could say anything, Ben was pressing his lips to yours, trapping you between the sink and his warm body. He ran a hand through your hair, the other resting on your waist. Your lips were covered with flour, but judging by the way he licked your lower lip before slipping his tongue in your mouth, it didn’t seem to bother him at all.

When he moved his lips to your jaw, and lower down your neck, you tightened your grip on his hair.

You barely knew him after all… Were you ready for that?

“Ben?” you breathed.

He hummed against your skin, licking that sweet spot behind your ear. You closed your eyes, throwing your head back slightly to give him better access to your sensitive skin, certain that you were about to faint.

But when his fingers slowly slipped under your T-shirt, your eyes snapped open.

“Stop,” you said firmly, resting your hand on his to prevent him from touching more of your skin.

Ben immediately froze, and slowly, he pulled away, looking at you with sheepish eyes and flushed cheeks.

“I didn’t mean to go too fast…” he breathed. “I’m sorry, I got carried away.”

“It’s okay.”

“I thought… I thought you wanted me to go so far. I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay.”

He nodded slowly, and you saw his Adam’s apple pulsing several times.

“I guess we should finish these cookies and… clean all this mess,” he whispered slowly.

But the truth was, you didn’t want to bake at all.

“Ben?” you whispered.

“What is it?”

“I don’t want us to bake. I couldn’t care less about cookies.”

“I don’t think we should rush…”

“It’s just… I need to ask you a very personal question before we…”

“Y/N… We should just…”

But you shushed him by pulling him down to you, pressing eagerly your lips against yours, in a passionate kiss that left him breathless.

“What do you want to know?” he asked, resting his brow against yours, his eyes still closed, his long fingers tracing patterns on your waist through the fabric of your T-shirt.

“Have you ever loved someone?”

He opened his eyes, staring intensely at you now.

“Have you ever been in love?” you asked again.

“Why… why do you want to know that?” he asked slowly, cautiously.

“Because…” you said, breathless all of a sudden. “I really… I do want you right now, but we don’t know each other so much and I’m so scared that you would leave right after we do this and never call me again…”

He shook his head, shushing you.

“Of course I’m not going to disappear,” he reassured you. “I really want to give us a chance. Which is why I can just go back to cooking if you think it’s too soon.”

But you shook your head.

“I just need you to answer the question… Because… it’s an important question and… I need to know before we go any further. I need to know something personal about you.”

You chuckled, blushing hard.

“It sounds so stupid,” you said.

“It’s not stupid at all,” he reassured you.

“I just need to know something personal about you, and I don’t reckon there’s anything more personal than… loving someone.”

Ben nodded slowly.

“All right but you’ve got to calm down, okay?” he said with the ghost of an amused smile brushing his lips.

You nodded, taking a deep breath, and both Ben and you let out a chuckle.

“Yes, I’ve already been in love,” he nodded, his thumb stroking tenderly your cheekbone.

“What happened?” you asked.

“She didn’t love me back.”

You silently encouraged him to continue, but he shrugged.

“She wasn’t with me because she loved me,” he said, and there was melancholia in his deep voice. “She was with me because I was famous. I think she liked the image I give of myself in public. But she didn’t like the normal guy that hides behind a mask of confidence. She didn’t like my insecurities. She didn’t like the shy English man I am whenever I don’t have to smile at cameras. So… she cheated on me with my best friend. Or well… former best friend, obviously.”

He looked down at his feet, letting out a nervous chuckle.

“I… It made more cautious with people,” he said. “More defensive. I’m not as naive now as I was before her. It takes me more time to trust people now.”

“Do you trust me?” you asked in a shaking whisper.

Ben looked up at you, nodding slowly.

“I don’t care about your work,” you said earnestly, and he could read in your eyes that it was true.

“I know. I know, it’s okay. I trust you on that,” he said. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

He looked intensely at you for a moment, although his stare was soft and caring.

“What about you?” he asked softly. “I’ve told you my worst heartbreak. I guess you can tell me yours.”

“He was offered a job on the other side of the planet,” you said slowly. “And he didn’t reckon that I was worth trying to maintain our relationship despite the distance.”

Ben nodded slowly.

“Distance makes things complicated,” he said.

“It’s still worth a try.”

He nodded again.

“Well, he’s a jerk, obviously,” he smiled.

You laughed.

“And she’s a bitch, obviously,” you said.

You stared intensely at his dark eyes, before going on your tiptoe, approaching your lips from his.

“Are you sure about that?” Ben asked in a breath.

You nodded, and he closed the space between your lips.

“You’re safe with me,” Ben whispered in your ear, holding you tightly in his strong arms. “I won’t hurt you. Just a word from you and we stop everything, okay?”

You nodded, his lips peppering kisses down your neck that set your heart and soul on fire.

“You’re safe with me, Y/N…”

But you merely moaned in response as he softly bit this soft spot on your neck.

Your fingers were trembling as they unbuttoned his shirt, but your mind wasn’t hesitating. You took a sharp intake of breath when the piece of clothing fell to the ground in a thud, but your brain wasn’t surprised by how smooth and warm his skin was.

And well… your niece didn’t have cookies that night…


	4. Interview Accident

You giggled as Ben played with your hair. You chased his hand away, but he merely pouted in response, making you laugh even more.

After three months of relationship you could still barely believe that this was real, that he was by your side. You couldn’t believe that he was _yours_ and you were _his._

He was so sweet and adorable and funny and just… everything you had been looking for. Now you could realize it. It was too soon into your relationship to tell him about how you felt but there was no mystery around your emotions for him.

You loved him.

You loved him like you had never loved anyone in your life and… it felt good. It felt wonderful. It was like a dream. Everything was blur except when you were with him. Perhaps it was too intense to be reasonable, but you didn’t care. Ben was like a drug you were addicted to by now, and you didn’t want to find a cure.

He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close to his chest, and he buried his face in the crook of your neck, making sure his beard brushed against your bare shoulder in the process, and he smirked as you shivered under his touch.

“Stop doing that!” you protested despite the smile on your face. “I hate it.”

“Liar, I know you love it,” he whispered in a husky voice, repeating the motion again, making you close your eyes.

“Okay, I do love it,” you admitted, losing your fingers in his hair.

You took a look at his watch on your bedside table, and heaved a sigh.

“We have to get up,” you said. “I have to go to work, and you have to get prepared for this interview of yours.”

He groaned, holding you more tightly against him.

“Or we could stay here and pretend we didn’t wake up this morning…” he proposed.

“And then I could get fired and your agent could get really pissed off,” you replied.

“Sounds like troubles.”

“Too many for me to deal with.”

He looked up at you, resting his head on his pillow again. He took your hand slowly in his. Your wrist was healed, but he was still hesitant whenever he touched your hand, still afraid to hurt you. He stared at you in silence for a while. He seemed lost in thought, a dreamy smile on his lips.

“I’ll watch you, you know,” you smiled.

He raised an eyebrow.

“How could you? You’ll be at work when I give my interview.”

“I’ll take a break,” you shrugged.

“You don’t have to do that, you know?”

“Why… you don’t want me to watch your interview?” you asked, laughing at him.

He rolled his eyes.

“Of course you can watch it. But I don’t want you to be in trouble with your boss on my behalf.”

“I won’t be in trouble,” you reassured him. “Unless I’m late for work.”

Ben moaned, wincing, before finally letting go of you.

“Alright, go on then… leave me here alone!” he dramatically cried.

“Oh… poor Ben…” you purred, biting his earlobe, and you knew he had closed his eyes.

“It’s not nice to tease,” he said.

“I guess you’ll get your revenge tonight then,” you said in a husky voice.

He looked at you, raising an eyebrow, a dangerous glint alit in his eyes.

“Are you sure you want to play this game with me?” he asked, pecking your lips several times.

You merely nodded, capturing his lips with yours.

When you pulled away, he moaned in disappointment.

“You’re so damn cruel,” he complained.

You merely laughed, sitting up and stealing his shirt to cover yourself.

“I hope your interview goes well,” you said, standing up as you buttoned his shirt.

“I reckon it’s just gonna be dull,” he reassured you, putting on his pants.

“Want some tea?” you offered, walking to the kitchen.

He didn’t answer and merely wrapped his arms around you as you purred some water in your kettle, and he pressed your back against his chest, kissing your neck.

“Your place or mine tonight?” he asked, his lips still resting against your skin, and his warm breath made you shiver.

“I’ll probably finish late tonight,” you replied, trying to hide your reaction as he moaned against your neck, his low voice trembling through your skin.

“What if I pick up some food and come here with diner then?” he offered, his lips close to your ear now. “Chinese?”

You nodded, a grin that you couldn’t hide crossing your face.

“That would be perfect.”

You let him drop a sweet kiss on your cheek, your grin still on your face. You were so happy with him… you guessed that everything was perfect.

But things were never perfect for long…

—————————————————————————————————-

When your boss called for you, you thought you were going to be in trouble. What other reason could make your boss call for you to meet her in her office?

You knocked on her door, timidly entering when she invited you in.

“Y/N! Come on, sit down,” she invited you, her eyes still fixed on her computer.

You did as you were told, looking cautiously at your boss as she turned towards you.

“Did I do something wrong?” you asked earnestly, unwilling to lose your time with meaningless talk.

But your boss merely laughed.

“You did nothing wrong, Y/N! On the contrary.”

She leaned over her desk, and there was a malicious smile that curled up her lips.

“Actually, you’ve been doing an extremely good job for a while now. And I thought that such a hard work deserved to pay off. So…”

She took a file from one of her drawers, and opened it before her.

“I’ve received a demand, there is a job to fulfill. And I thought about you.”

You narrowed your eyes, and her smile widened.

“Would you like to have a promotion?”

Your eyes grew round, a grin ghosting your lips.

“I know you’ve been waiting for quite a while for this,” she said slowly.

“I have indeed,” you nodded.

That was true. You had been working so hard for so long now. But it was finally worth it. The long evenings when you stayed alone at the office, working when everyone had left…

“You’re perfect for the job,” she went on. “I know you are. And there is another advantage, besides inflating your ego…”

She presented the contract to you, and pointed at the last lines.

Your eyes grew even rounder than before, and the numbers written there elicited a grin from you. You blinked several times, but the numbers didn’t change.

You were to be paid almost twice the money you earned for now…

“So?” your boss asked. “It’s a yes, right?”

You started to slowly nod, but you quickly cleared your mind.

You had longed for this for a long while now. It didn’t mean that you should take a leap blindly.

“I’ll read the contract first, though,” you said cautiously.

“Of course,” your boss smiled. “Although, judging by how hard you’ve been working lately, I know you’re going to accept.”

You didn’t reply, your eyes quickly scanning the document until…

Until you found it. The trap that was set for you to jump in.

Because things were never perfect for long…

“The job is in Austria…” you breathed.

“Indeed, it is,” your boss said, matter-of-factly, drinking some of her coffee.

“I live in London,” you breathed.

“Yes, but there’s no job available in London,” she laughed.

“But… My life is here…”

She suddenly felt that you were about to decline her offer. But how could you accept? Yes, you had craved for this for a while now but… there was another variable in the equation that had changed your whole life lately.

What about Ben?

He was already staying in London for you, you knew he was. He couldn’t possibly move to Austria, you knew it, and anyway you couldn’t ask him to do something like this for you.

And the rest of your life was here as well : your family, your friends… You couldn’t possibly let everything behind you and leave…

Oh but you had worked so hard and sacrificed so much…

Your boss cleared her throat, and when she spoke again, her voice was low and predatory.

“Y/N, you should consider this offer very seriously. There might not be another offer like this one for years…”

You nodded slowly. You understood the opportunity that was offered to you. You understood that it was rare, and that you were lucky that your boss believed in you enough to put her own reputation in danger for you, by recommending you for the job. And if you were being honest with yourself, you knew that three months before, you wouldn’t have hesitated a single second and you would have agreed for this right away. You would have gone home and packed your things and grabbed a flight before the end of the week.

But now there was Ben in your life, and you didn’t want to lose him…

“I need to think about it,” you said slowly.

“I need an answer before the end of the week,” your boss warned you. “You would be leaving next Monday.”

You nodded slowly.

“I am conscious of the opportunity you’re offering me,” you said slowly. “I understand that you’re entrusting me with something very important, and in which you are personally involved. But moving to Austria is a big change of life and… I need to think about it before giving you my decision.”

Your boss nodded slowly as you stood from your chair, holding the file in your hands.

“What’s his name?” she asked as you rested your hand on the doorknob of her door.

You turned slowly towards her. But she smiled at you.

“You were so motivated to get a promotion. And suddenly you hesitate? There’s only one plausible reason for this sudden change of attitude. So, what’s his name?”

“Ben,” you breathed softly.

She nodded slowly.

“Well, I hope he’s worth it.”

You didn’t reply, opening the door and walking out of her office.

You walked back to your desk and started to read with careful attention the entire document.

It was exactly what you wanted. Exactly the job you longed for.

But it was in Austria.

You didn’t know what to do. You guessed that you would have to wait to talk about this with Ben. Because deep down, you knew that if he didn’t agree to stay with you despite the distance, if he stated that he would never follow you there, you would decline the offer.

You couldn’t leave without him.

You couldn’t live without him…

——————————————————————————————

You stopped working ten minutes before the hour of his interview on TV and you walked to a deserted corridor. You knew the interview could be found online as well. So you waited for the right time, before searching for the channel website. You searched for several minutes before finding the right link, and finally you managed to catch up on the TV talk-show.

You waited patiently through the first part of the TV show, until Ben was finally called.

Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of his bright smile and grey suit.

The beginning of the interview went on smoothly, as Ben answered to questions asked about the movie he was promoting. A tender smile formed on your lips throughout the interview, as you listened to his shy jokes and kind remarks. But then…

“And your character goes through quite a difficult time on a personal point of view as well in this movie, doesn’t he?” the presenter asked.

“Indeed, he doesn’t really know how to deal with his life in general and he can’t see how to handle a relationship at this point of his life,” Ben answered, nodding.

“Has it ever been a problem for you in real life?” the journalist asked.

He laughed, blushing hard. He was clearly uncomfortable now, and the smile on your face slowly faded.

“Like everyone, I guess,” he answered elusively.

“Do you have a girlfriend at the moment?” the journalist asked him. “Come on, you can tell us!”

But Ben shook his head.

“I’m single.”

Your phone fell to the ground, slipping through your fingers, your eyes wide with shock. The dropped thing kept on playing the video and you vaguely heard that the interview was over, but your brain couldn’t analyze any information for now…

You could barely breathe. You didn’t notice the tears in your eyes, nor your trembling hands. You were too much in shock to realize anything. The earth could have been shaken by an earthquake under you, the walls could have exploded all around you, you wouldn’t have noticed anything. Your brain was still trying to process Ben’s words, trying to find their real meaning.

He had just said on TV that he was single when… when he wasn’t single at all. He was with _you._

It felt like he had erased you from existence with just one sentence. Like you didn’t exist. It was as if… as if you were nothing to him.

The tears rolled down your cheeks, but you weren’t aware of the salty drops falling from your eyes.

Ben had just said in front of the whole world that he was single. He had just told the world that you didn’t exist.

You shook yourself.

Perhaps you were overreacting though. Perhaps he didn’t mean that. Perhaps… but he had said the words right? _I’m single._..

Perhaps you were overreacting, but for now you felt like he had torn your heart away from your chest, and stamped upon it, crushing the fragile organ until it was nothing but a bruised and pitiful thing beating slowly on the ground.

You couldn’t stay at your workplace. You boss would hate it, but you just couldn’t. Now that you had realized how much you were crying, you couldn’t just there, sitting on the ground in the middle of a deserted corridor.

You picked up your phone, and slowly rose from the ground.

You needed to think… you needed to think about a thousand things…

—————————————————————————————————-

Ben hurried to your home. From his car to your door, he almost ran. He was eager to see you. He was eager to forget this interview of his. Boring and personal questions, it had been torture to him. So when he hurried to your home, carrying a bag filled with your favourite Chinese food, he had an excited grin on his lips.

He knocked, but you didn’t answer.

He knocked again, harder this time. Perhaps you hadn’t heard him the first time…

But his knocking on your door was met by nothing but silence once more.

He frowned hard, checking his watch.

It was almost nine, surely you were home by now, even if you had finished to work late.

He pressed his ear to the door, and he could guess the sound of TV coming from inside.

You were home. But for some reason, you were not coming to open the door for him…

He tried to knock again, but as he received no answer once more, he tried the doorknob.

The door was open.

He came in, his smile back on his face. For sure you had told him to walk in but he hadn’t heard you.

He closed the door behind him, shouting a merry ‘Hey baby!’ at you, and he put his bag full of food on your table.

Finally, he walked to the sofa where you were sitting, shrugging off his jacket and throwing it on a chair.

“Hey, baby!” he cried again, falling next to you on the sofa.

But when he made a movement to kiss your cheek, you backed away. You turned off the TV, and slowly looked at him.

Your eyes were red and swollen. Clearly you had been crying. Although now, your eyes were dry and full of anger.

Ben frowned hard, worry painted all over his face.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked softly. “What happened?”

But when he made a movement to touch you, you backed away again.

He frowned hard.

“Y/N? Baby?”

But you clenched your jaw, and he knew he was the cause for your sorrow and your fury.

“What did I do?” he asked cautiously.

“You really have no idea?” you asked, your voice bitter.

But he shook his head, and you could see in his eyes that he really was left clueless by your anger.

“What did I do wrong?” he asked again.

You sniffed, feeling tears covering your eyes again, but you managed to keep a steady voice despite your sorrow.

“During the interview… you said you were single, remember that?”

He frowned hard.

“Y/N… it was a question coming from a journalist. Of course I said that I was single.”

“BUT YOU’RE NOT SINGLE!”

Your voice had turned from a shaking whisper to a loud shout in just a second, and Ben couldn’t help but lean back slightly. He was frowning slightly, his chocolate eyes throwing a cautious look at you.

“Y/N… That’s not what I meant,” he said slowly, his voice calm.

But you were tired of remaining calm. You were exhausted. You had had too many emotions in just one single day.

And perhaps he hadn’t realized it, but he had broken your heart.

“What did you mean then?! I reckon it was explicit enough!” you replied, still shouting.

“Y/N, it was a personal question. Of course I lied!”

“Are you really sure that you were lying? Cause you were pretty convincing!”

You stared at each other for a while.

“I’m nothing to you, right?!” you spat.

“Don’t be ridiculous! You know it’s not true!” he said, raising his voice as well now.

“You told this journalist, in front of the entire country… in front of the entire world, that I don’t exist!”

“That’s not what I did! I protected us!”

“Oh really? And how so?”

“I don’t want paparazzi in our lives. I don’t want the journalists to know anything about my personal life. I don’t want them to know about us, because I don’t want you to have to answer questions about us.”

You didn’t answer for a while, so he went on.

“If I had told them the truth, then they would have tried to know who you are. And I don’t want them into our lives, Y/N.”

“It made me feel so bad!” you said, crying by now, your voice nothing more than a low and shaking mess. “It hurt me so much! It made me feel like I was nothing to you.”

“But you know it’s not true,” he said, and his voice was tender now.

“What am I to you? Really, I need to know.”

“You’re my girlfriend,” he answered, frowning, as if it was the stupidest question in the world.

Although to you it was everything but stupid.

“How do you see our relationship evolve?” you asked back, sniffing again.

He shrugged, staring at you, and he seemed to be a bit lost again.

“I don’t know, Y/N… we’ll see.”

But you shook your head, looking down at your hands.

“Hey…”

You didn’t push him away this time when he took your face in his hands.

“I’m sorry I lied. But it’s what is best for us.”

“Next time, let me decide what is best for me,” you said coldly.

You freed your face from his tender grasp, and he remained there, sitting motionless next to you.

He knew you were mad at him about this interview of his. But he also could guess that there was something else bothering you.

“There’s something else, right?” he said slowly, watching you carefully, trying to read through your reactions. “What else did I do wrong?”

You shook your head, drying your cheeks with your sleeves.

“It’s not you…” you said softly.

But he could see that it was not completely true. You were avoiding his intense stare.

“But it’s about me all the same, am I right?” he said softly.

You finally looked up at him.

“My boss offered me a promotion today,” you said slowly.

“That’s wonderful!” he exclaimed, trying to hide the fact that he couldn’t see the link between this news and your sorrow.

“It’s in Austria,” you added.

His smile vanished instantly.

“What?” he breathed, taken aback.

“The job is in Austria,” you repeated.

“In Austria?”

“Yeah.”

“But… I can’t find a job in _Austria_ ,” he said, his eyes wandering in the room, shaking his head, and you knew he was more talking to himself than to you now. “I don’t speak the language, I… I can’t live there.”

He looked at you again.

“How long do you have to decide?” he asked.

“Till the end of the week,” you answered. “But I don’t think I’ll need so much time to decide.”

He looked cautiously at you,

“Really?”

“I’ve been working for months and months so hard to get a promotion…” you said earnestly.

He nodded slowly.

“I see,” he breathed.

“If we hadn’t met, I would have agreed right away. But we met. And when she offered me this job I… you hadn’t given your interview yet.”

“So you’re hesitating for me?” he asked softly, and you could read both hope and joy in his eyes.

But you shrugged.

“I was. Then you gave this shitty answer in your interview and I… I don’t know anymore.”

“Y/N…”

“I’ve sacrificed so many things for this job…” you breathed, shaking your head. “I can’t let it slip between my fingers, unless I have a very good reason to give up on it.”

You intensely stared at each other for a while, both of you wrapped in silence.

“Do I have a good reason to miss this opportunity?” you asked him, trying to control your shaking voice as your throat tightened uncontrollably.

“What am I supposed to answer to that?” he asked back.

“Convince me? Or not,” you answered.

He shrugged.

“You can do whatever you want,” he said, his voice colder than before.

And it wasn’t the right answer to give you at all…

“Then I guess you really were honest this afternoon during this interview,” you said bitterly.

“Of course I wasn’t!” he replied, raising his voice again, anger painted all over his face. “But what am I supposed to answer to such a question? Who am I to tell you to stay or leave?”

“You’re supposed to be my boyfriend.”

“I _am_ your boyfriend.”

“Then just tell me not to leave,” you said earnestly, your voice low and begging. “Or tell me that you don’t care. I just need to know what you see in me. Do you have feelings for me? Do you think it’s serious between us? I can’t give up on this job over nothing!”

He clenched his jaw. He didn’t know what to do. He told himself that it was because he didn’t want you to regret your decision if he asked you to stay.

But the truth was, he was just terrified. He knew what he needed to do to make you stay. And he wasn’t ready. He didn’t know if you felt the same…

So he left you the choice. Hoping you wouldn’t leave.

But you needed to _know_ what you meant for him…

“You should decide what is best for you,” he said softly.

You nodded, tears back in your eyes.

“I’ll take the job then.”

It was his time to nod slowly.

“Alright,” he said, but he struggled to hide the lump that crept up his throat. “I guess I could call and… see you on your computer and… try to go see you for the weekends…”

“We both know it’s not going to work, Ben,” you interrupted him, and you distinguished the withheld tears in his eyes that he was trying to control.

“We could try…” he said, his voice shaking.

“It’s not going to work. I’m not leaving for a few months. I’m leaving for good.”

He nodded, before standing up, and you were taken aback by his sudden movement.

You thought he would try to convince you to stay, that he would try to talk you out of it… but he was just giving up without a fight…

“When will you be leaving?” he asked.

“Next Monday,” you answered.

“I guess it means that it’s over between us, right?”

“I guess, yes,” you whispered.

He nodded. But again, he didn’t try to convince you. He merely walked to the door without a word, and left.

He rested his back for a few seconds against your wooden door. But he couldn’t hear you. He wondered if you were crying.

He walked to his car, and drove home. All the while he had remained calm, silent, not a single tear was wetting his cheeks.

It’s only when he had parked his car that he clenched his jaw. He unfastened his seatbelt slowly, and rested his hands on the wheel. He tightened his grip, more, and more, and more until his knuckles turned white. His jaw was so tightly clenched, it was painful.

Then a tear rolled down his eye, and he crumbled. A second later, he was sobbing. He regretted his decision already. He threw punches at the wheel several times in frustration, his hand now painful, although he didn’t care about the pain.

His broken heart was much more painful than his hand anyway…


	5. Plane Accident

Ben planted his fork in his piece of tart, but he couldn’t find a way to bring the food up to his mouth anymore. He had forced himself throughout the meal just to please his parents and try to hide how he felt, but now he was certain that if he took one more mouthful, he would throw up on the table.

The lump in his throat was too big to allow him to swallow anything else. His stomach was a mere tight knot that was unable to welcome any more food.

He took a look at his watch for what seemed to be the thousandth time.

It was 3 pm.

You were to leave at 5 pm.

It was Sunday. He had managed to learn the hour of your flight for Austria through a common friend. And in two hours, you would be in a plane, ready to leave your former life behind…

Ready to leave _him_ behind.

He had barely slept since _that_ night. He had barely eaten a thing in days. But he was still restless and he didn’t feel any need for food.

His life was suspended since _that_ night. He felt like he didn’t have taste for anything anymore.

He had never felt this way before, he had never been so desperate after a break-up…

“Ben?”

He looked up at his mother.

“Are you okay?” she asked him softly, cautiously.

“Of course,” he smiled.

“You don’t like the cake? I thought it was one of your favourites.”

“I do love it. But I’ve eaten too much already I’m afraid.”

“Are you kidding? You’ve barely eaten anything today,” his father replied.

Ben shrugged, looking down at his plate.

“I’m just not very hungry today…”

Tricia and Thomas Barnes exchanged a glance.

“Son, what’s wrong?” Tricia asked him.

“Nothing, I’m fine.”

“Now, you may be a good actor, but you’re an awful liar,” his father smiled, not buying it for a second.

Jack nudged his brother.

“Come on, what’s wrong? You’ve been in an awful mood during the whole lunch.”

“I’m fine,” Ben replied again, although his voice was colder now.

He didn’t need his parents and his brother to add any drama to the situation. He didn’t need them to ask him about you. He didn’t need them to analyze him. He didn’t need them to try to dissect his brain…

He was too sad and upset and desperate to handle it.

“Ben, you know you can talk to us,” his mother insisted anyway.

“Please I just… I don’t want to talk about it,” he replied, heaving a sigh.

“So there _is_ something wrong.”

“Mum…”

“Come on, son,” his father insisted.

Ben buried his face in his hands.

“Please, leave me alone…” he shook his head.

Jack rested his hand on Ben’s shoulder.

“Ben…”

“For fuck’s sake, drop it!” Ben suddenly roared.

Everyone in the room remained frozen after the sudden outburst.

Ben heaved a sigh, grabbing his plate and standing up, almost running to the kitchen.

He felt like he was about to cry again…

As if he hadn’t cried enough these past few days… he found amazing the amount of tears a human being could cry in less than a week.

He threw the plate in the sink, resting his hands on the cold edge, and took a deep breath.

He needed to calm down.

He looked at his watch one more time.

3:15 pm.

The scene was playing before his eyes again, replacing the sight of his parents’ garden by your face covered with tears.

He could hear your words over and over again.

And he hadn’t done anything to hold you back.

On the moment he had thought that it was the best he could do for you. But now…

Now that the scene was taking place in his imagination again he wished he had talked you out of the whole thing. He wished he had given you arguments that would have made you give him a second chance. He wished he had begged you to stay with him in London.

He wished he hadn’t been a proud fool and had confessed his feelings when he still had time…

Because now you were about to depart for Austria, and he had missed his chance to tell you that he loved you more than he had ever loved anyone before. He had missed the chance to tell you all the things you had changed in his life for the better…

He started when his mother rested her hand on his shoulder, and he turned towards her.

“Ben, why are you crying?”

He suddenly noticed the salty droplets on his cheeks, and he swept them away.

He merely shrugged.

So she used another technique she knew worked very well with her elder son, no matter how old he was : she wrapped her arms around him and held him against her, her embrace a comforting and reassuring cocoon.

They remained there, motionless, standing in the middle of the kitchen, for a while. Thomas and Jack walked into the room as well, remaining silent as long as Ben and his mother had not broken their embrace.

“Come on, now,” she said, looking up at him again. “What’s wrong?”

Ben heaved a sigh, leaning against the sink behind him. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration.

“I think…” he said slowly, fighting against his tight throat to make the words pass his lips. “I think that I’ve done a mistake. And I can’t make things right.”

“What did you do?”

He looked down at his feet, crossing his arms before his chest.

“I… I met someone a few months ago and… I fucked up.”

“You met someone?” Thomas asked, leaning against the sink next to his elder son.

Ben nodded.

“She’s wonderful,” he said, a little smile playing on his lips. “But… she got an opportunity for a job in another country and… I didn’t try to hold her back.”

Ben looked at his father.

“I thought… on the moment I thought that it was the best I could do for her. I know she has been working so hard for months to get a promotion. So when she talked to me about it, and said that she was hesitating and… that she was seriously thinking about leaving, I didn’t say anything, and I didn’t try to talk her out of it. But now I feel like shit.”

“When is she leaving?”

“At 5 pm today.”

“I see…”

“I just thought… I thought it was the best for her. But I just… I don’t want her to leave.”

Thomas rested his hand on his son’s shoulder.

“Ben… I’m sure you thought that it was what was best for her. I’m sure you were trying to be a gentleman and to leave her the choice. But the truth is… if you don’t fight for her, a woman won’t stay.”

They stared at each other for a moment, while Ben’s father was letting his words sink in.

“What if it was a test?” the older man went on. “You said she had a job opportunity. Perhaps she needed to see what she meant to you before taking her decision. You know, this kind of generous behaviour when the hero lets the woman he loves go because he thinks it’s best… It’s just cinema. And in real life, Humphrey Bogart’s character would be only a fool for letting the woman he has always loved get in this bloody plane.”

Ben couldn’t refrain a smile.

Perhaps his father was right… But what then?

“So what am I supposed to do then? She has already accepted the offer, she’s about to get on a plane. What am I supposed to do?”

Jack looked at his watch.

“If we take my car, we can still be at Heathrow on time,” he said, smiling at his brother.

Ben tried to think for a moment….

But he couldn’t force his brain to work anymore.

He had to get you back… he felt like his life depended on it, like he would die if he couldn’t have you by his side again…

He felt like he would die if he didn’t get the chance to tell you all these things he had kept for himself for now…

“Alright, you drive,” he nodded.

The next second, the four of them were sitting in Jack’s car.

“Alright, you should…” Thomas started but both Ben and Jack stopped him.

“Don’t you start. Any of you,” Jack warned his parents.

“I know this town very well! Better than you, young man.”

“But I’m the driver here.”

“Jack, please, start the fucking car…” Ben breathed.

The drive to the airport was torture. Pure torture. Ben kept his eyes almost constantly locked on his watch. He felt like every second that he spent on the road was the second that would make him arrive there too late.

Jack managed to stop the car before the airport, and Ben did nothing less than jump out of the vehicle, running towards the large building.

He looked everywhere for the right sign that would give him the boarding gate where you were supposed to register before taking your flight.

His heart was beating so fast, he thought he was about to have a heart attack.

But then he spotted the right line. You were to register right now, but perhaps he wasn’t too late…

He started to run through the airport, looking for the right gate, looking for you through the crowd, but your face was all he could see anyway, and there was an ocean of people in there, and children were crying, and his thoughts were messy, and his heart was beating so damn fast and…

He spotted the right number.

Again the race. Again his feet hitting violently the ground. Again his struggle for air. Again his rushing heart crashing against his ribcage…

He arrived next to all these people who were waiting there, all arranged in a single file.

His dark brown eyes were frantically looking at all the faces, looking for you…

He took his phone as he couldn’t find you.

He tried to call you, but you didn’t answer his call.

He sent you a text instead. And then a second. And one more text followed.

He called you again, his eyes still scanning the crowd…

… until…

———————————————————————–

You heaved a sigh, taking a look at your watch. You were thirty minutes early, but you were sure you would have to wait for a long while before reaching the other side of the gate.

Next to you, there was a young child crying. He had been howling for almost ten minutes now, and you thought you were about to go nuts.

You took your phone, trying to pass the time. Surely you could find some stupid app to play with.

You unlocked your phone, falling upon this picture of you and Ben you had taken a few weeks before. You were kissing his cheek, both of you grinning.

You hadn’t had the heart to replace the picture yet, and even now, a small smile appeared on your lips as the memories of this afternoon came back to you.

You heaved a sigh, looking for a game through all your apps.

But then, the screen changed, and for the first time since _that_ night, Ben’s name appeared on your phone.

He was calling you.

You remained frozen, staring at the screen. You didn’t block the call you merely didn’t answer, the device trembling in your hand.

But then it stopped, and the picture of Ben and you appeared again.

You waited but he didn’t leave a message.

Instead, your phone vibrated again as your received a text from him…

You read the message…

_Are you already in the plane?_

You didn’t move. You didn’t answer. You merely stared at your phone again.

A new wave of vibrations running through your hand. A new text…

_Y/N please, don’t get in that plane_

You felt tears reaching the corners of your eyes.

A new message…

_I’m begging you. I’m begging you, don’t go. I’m at the airport, I’m looking for you. Please don’t go. Don’t leave me. Answer the phone, please… give me another chance._

You had barely finished to read the text that Ben’s name was appearing on the screen again, as he was calling you again.

Your eyes were fixed on your phone, oblivious of the world around you…

…until…

“Y/N…”

You looked up, the sound of his voice shaking your very soul.

And your eyes met his dark chocolate glance, and you were lost, falling for them just like you had fallen the very first time you had sunk into them on that shitty morning in the streets of London…

“Y/N…”

You saw him swallowing hard.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” he asked softly, peering at the people surrounding the two of you.

But you shook your head.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” you replied.

You advanced, following the woman before you, and Ben did the same.

“Y/N… please…”

“I need to catch this plane. I need to get on this plane. And I don’t want to wait for an eternity to do it,” you added, nodding towards the people who were patiently waiting behind you.

Ben clenched his jaw. But it wasn’t the moment to be shy, or to think about his pride. If he really had to do what he intended to do in front of all this people, then he would do it.

“I know I fucked up,” he said, staring at you. “I should have talked you out of all this.”

“But you didn’t,” you replied bitterly, and Ben knew his father had been right.

“I thought that it was what you wanted, and I didn’t want you to give up on something you have worked so much for just because of me… But the truth is, I need you. Don’t get on that plane.”

He knew that people around the two of you were listening closely to the conversation. But he didn’t care. This was too important…

“Y/N… Y/N, I don’t want you to go.”

“I can’t give up on such a great opportunity for nothing,” you replied, taking another step towards the gate, not looking at him anymore.

“I’ll tell the journalists we’re together next time,” he argued.

“I don’t care about that.”

“I’ll make things better, I’ll change if you want me to.”

“I don’t want you to change, Ben.”

“I’d do anything…”

You advanced again.

“I just needed a good reason to stay. And you didn’t fight for me…”

“I acted stupid, I know it was a mistake.”

“It’s too late now. I’ve accepted the job, I have to go.”

He suddenly took your face in his hands, forcing you to look up at him. You felt shivers running up and down your spine because of his gentle and yet firm touch.

“I need you. I’ve been through hell since you left. I didn’t want you to give up on the job of your dreams for me but the truth is… I need you like I need air to breathe and I can’t live without you.”

You remained frozen, your eyes slightly round.

He had never talked like this to you.

There were shining tears in his eyes, and his voice was low and rushed and deep and…

He meant it. Every single word of it. There was no doubt to have, he was earnest.

“I need you,” he said again. “I need you in my life. Please. Give me a second chance. If you really have to go, then go. Just… don’t say that it’s over between us. Say that we’ll work something out. Say that you’ll give me a chance. Say that we’ll still be together when you get on that plane. Say that I wasn’t too late to fight for you, because I _am_ fighting right now. I am fighting as hard as I can to get you back and I’m ready to do anything… I’ll go see you every weekend. I’ll take jobs there. I’ll scream throughout the airport, I’ll do anything… Please. Please, Y/N…”

“Why would I do that?”

You both stared at each other for a while, drowning into the other’s eyes…

You made a movement to free yourself so you could take another step, but he didn’t let you, and he forced you to keep on looking at him.

And then the words came out without him being able to control them…

“Because I love you.”

You gasped.

“Because I love you with all my heart,” Ben went on, knowing that it was his last chance to tell you. “Because I love you like I’ve never loved anyone before. Because you stormed into my life trying to kill me, but the truth is… you saved me. You made me come back home. You made me live the happiest moments of my life and I don’t want this to be then end. I’d do anything… I’d do anything just to have a chance to show you how much I love you. I’ll make amend, you’ll see. I love you. I love you, please… don’t go or at least don’t say that it’s over.”

But someone before you cleared his throat, and you knew it was your turn.

You didn’t have any time left, you had to choose…

“Y/N… please… please, I love you. Don’t get in that plane. Don’t leave me.”

You blinked, before freeing your face from his tender hold, and this time he didn’t stop you.

He loved you. He wanted you to stay…

But you were suffering too much because of him, and that voice in your head kept on telling you the same thing over and over again.

_Run…_

“I’m sorry,” you merely said.

You turned away from him, gave your ticket and ID to the man at the gate, and you walked further on.

“Y/N…”

The sound of Ben’s voice made your hands shake as you took your ticket and your ID back.

“Y/N!”

You heard him struggle against someone, and you guessed that the security guards were stopping him from following you.

“Y/N!”

He was bellowing your name, shouting through the airport, and his voice contained so much pain…

But you didn’t turn back. You kept on walking down the corridor that would lead you to your plane, without throwing a single glance back at him.

You didn’t want him to see that you were crying.

——————————————————————-

He watched you walking away. He watched you as you advanced without looking back at him. You didn’t turn around, not even once. You didn’t slow down when he screamed your name through the airport. You didn’t hesitate.

He stopped fighting against the large security guard who was still clinging on him to prevent him from following you.

He stopped fighting.

He waited until you had disappeared, until he couldn’t see you anymore, your shape swallowed by the corridor and the people who hurried around you.

And then he turned around and walked away.

He walked slowly out of the airport, his movements calm.

He easily spotted his brother’s car, and climbed in without a word.

“So? How did it go?” Jack asked his brother eagerly.

But Ben shook his head.

“Could you take me home, please?” Ben asked softly, his voice just barely louder than a whisper.

Jack nodded slowly, and started the car.

Tricia rested a hand on Ben’s shoulder, but he shrugged her off.

He set his dark eyes on the moving street, and for a long while there was no sound in the car but the humming of the engines.

Halfway to his flat, Ben sniffed.

And this time when his mother rested her hand on his shoulder, he didn’t push her away. He merely sniffed again instead.

——————————————————————————-

You had been among the first to get on the plane. You were sitting next to a young man who seemed to be leaving for his job. He was wearing an expensive suit, and had a perfect haircut, and the smell of his aftershave was too strong and made you wince slightly.

He gave you a bright smile.

“So? Why are you going to Austria?” he asked you, trying to start the conversation.

“For my job,” you answered with a polite smile.

“Me too. For how long are you staying there?”

“I’m moving there, actually.”

“I see.”

You talked for a few minutes with him. He seemed nice. He was handsome. He seemed to be the kind of man who would not call you again after he had slept with you, but would have warned you so the night before.

After a while he gave you his card.

“If you’d like to take a drink some evening…” he proposed with a smile. “I’ve been there a few times, I know a few places you might like.”

You looked down at the card.

Moving in another town… it was the perfect occasion to start your life all over again, to write a brand new chapter. And a one-night stand was a good way to start your new life as well.

But then it stroke you.

The fact that you felt like you were cheating on Ben just by considering the possibility to spend a night with this man. The fact that you missed him so much it was physically painful. The fact that you felt like you were merely surviving instead of living since he had left your home.

The fact that you didn’t want a brand new life. You wanted the one you had with him.

You thought about _that_ night one more time and… the truth was, it wasn’t really his fault. You knew he just meant to protect you by lying to these journalists. You knew he didn’t mean any harm. You shouldn’t have overreacted the way you had. You shouldn’t have wanted him to tell you how he felt for you if he wasn’t ready to say it.

And now he had confessed everything, and you were running away when he had opened up to you and told you that he loved you.

He had come to the airport to convince you to stay, or to at least give him a chance, he had made his speech before perfect strangers, he had cried your name through the airport to make you stay…

And you were leaving?

You couldn’t be so stupid…

What the hell were you still doing in this plane?!

“No, thank you,” you smiled at the stranger next to you, shaking your head. “You see… I’m not single.”

He shrugged, putting his card back in his pocket.

“He’s a lucky man.”

“I’m the lucky one, I reckon.”

You stood up, and walked towards the door of the plane, through which people were still getting in.

“Madam, you can’t get out,” the flight attendant told you, stopping you.

“I need to get out,” you replied.

“You can’t, I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want to take this flight, I need to get out of this plane.”

“Madam, I’m sorry, but it’s too late…”

“I need to get out,” you replied stubbornly.

“You told me so before, but I’m repeating you, you can’t get out.”

“Why not? I won’t ask for my ticket to be paid back, I won’t ask for anything, I just want to walk down this staircase and leave this fucking plane!”

“And why would you want to do that?”

But then another flight attendant appeared by your side.

“We have a problem with the reactor,” she told her colleague, barely noticing your presence. “The plane is grounded, we have to change. Everyone gets out.”

It was a sign.

You had never believed in signs before, but… You were about to leave and finally changed your mind but was unable to get out of the plane and now… the thing couldn’t fly…

If this was not a sign…

A smile appeared on your face.

It seemed like everything that dealt with Ben happened in accidents and unexpected things and just… in a huge mess…

But it was so exciting and… it was obvious somehow : you needed to get out of this plane, get out of this airport, and get back to him.

You waited for what seemed like forever to finally walk out of the plane and get your suitcase back. But the moment you had found your suitcase again, you didn’t lose a second.

You ran out of the building, looking for a cab. A car. Anything… you could have abandoned your suitcase there and grabbed a bike if you had had the chance…

You needed to go to his flat and see him.

You ran to the next cab that was coming your way and jumped inside the vehicle.

“Where are you going, Madam?” the driver asked you calmly.

You gave him Ben’s address.

“Please, it’s an emergency. Go there as fast as you can.”

But the travel to his flat was torture. Pure torture.

Your palms were wet, you felt like you couldn’t catch your breath after your run out of Heathrow.

You were so scared, you felt like the more you lost time in that cab, the more you risked to lose him for good…

You paid the driver as he parked his car before the building where Ben lived, and you rushed out of the car, forgetting your suitcase on the backseat.

“Madam! Your suitcase!”

You cursed yourself under your breath, and ran back to the car to get your things back.

You looked at your watch.

It was six o'clock.

Ben had seen you at the airport a bit less than an hour and a half before. That was a long time ago…

Shit…

You ran into the hall, heading for the elevator.

But it was filled with people and your suitcase would never fit in there…

Fuck…

You hurried towards the stairs, cursing Ben for living on the fourth floor.

You ran up the first flight of stairs…

First floor.

Second floor.

Third floor.

You had to stop to catch your breath. You could barely breathe, your lungs on fire, your throat dry. Your arm was painful from carrying your suitcase and pulling it up the stairs.

But Ben’s face appeared before your eyes again, and you started to climb the stairs again, out of breath, your side painful, your legs stiff under you, but you didn’t care.

Finally, you saw it painted upon the door…

Fourth floor.

You opened the door and hurried down the corridor until you reached his door.

You knocked on the door as hard as you could.

You were struggling for breath, you were a mess and you knew it, but you didn’t give a damn.

It felt like an eternity was passing by before the door would finally open.

Ben stared at you with round eyes. But when you opened your mouth to speak, you could only cough as you were still trying to catch your breath.

“You’re okay?” he asked, arching his eyebrows.

You nodded, finally calming down.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in a plane?” he asked.

You finally noticed that his eyes were red and slightly swollen, stained with blood. He had been crying…

“The engine didn’t work,” you replied.

You laughed. You started to uncontrollably laughed, and Ben frowned, but you didn’t care.

“It’s like… Nothing goes as planned and everything is just a series of catastrophes and accidents whenever you’re around,” you said.

Ben frowned even more.

“But it’s okay. I guess this fortune cookie was right after all. I guess that destiny must really strike by accident. And I love it,” you breathed. “I love it, and I love you.”

Suddenly he wasn’t frowning anymore. He was merely staring at you.

“I’m sorry,” you said, suddenly noticing that your laugh had turned into tears. “I’m sorry. It’s all my fault. I overreacted, and… I’m sorry. I love you.”

“Are you going to leave?”

But you shook your head.

“No. No, I’m not leaving. Why would I? You’re here, aren’t you? And it’s enough…”

But you couldn’t finish your speech.

Ben had closed the space between the two of you, wrapping his arms around you and pressing you against him, kissing you deeply.

You smiled into the kiss, and you felt that Ben was doing the same.

You were starting to like accidents and misfortunes and unexpected things…


End file.
